Wednesday, August 24, 2011

For guys who don't think of the mushy stuff here it is broken down for you in terms you can understand.

Sunday we had a lesson on having a happy marriage, he gave an analogy that I didn't like but the idea sparked my own thoughts and I figured this is a good place to put them down. It applies best to men or more specifically men who love cars. It's not perfect but it gives a perspective so here it is.

Imagine your relationship as an exotic super car, it could be a Ferrari or Lamborghini, Porsche or anything you are interested in . First off they don't give these things away- you have to earn it, because it has value. So put the effort in, with a car you have to build wealth to purchase it with a marriage you have to build yourself into to something others would value. It's value for value remember you want a super car not a beat up rusty vw beetle. If you are already married did you put yourself in debt, do you owe someone something for what you got of high value?

Once you have obtained your dream car you obviously treat it differently than you would anything everyday, you drive it different you park it different. You don't take it places it shouldn't be, (bad neighborhoods, walmart parking lot) you protect it. If you hear strange sounds you have it checked out- waiting could cost you time and money.

A major fight could cause big problems in a marriage and even end it if its a problem that has been ignored for some time. If the transmission goes out you get it replaced because your super car still has value- so does your marriage, get it fixed. It may need a dent repair or a paint job, it may even need a major overhaul of most of the main components but ask yourself this, who was driving when all this damage was done? In reality the condition of the car is your responsibility. You may decide to not have the transmission fixed, its your choice but now all you can do is keep it in the garage and wash it, let your friends see it when they come over but you will never have real enjoyment until it's back on the road. You may not be able to fix everything that is wrong but there are people who can so get it to a shop if it needs it, it might be a little embarrassing to let people see you have a problem you can't fix but if they are close to you they have already heard the sounds of a problem as you have driven by.

Yelling at your car will get you no where, just make you look like an out of control idiot, same with marriage. To get where you want to go you have to take the appropriate steps, unlock the door, get in, put the keys in the ignition and start it. Put it in gear give it some gas and steer it where it needs to go. A marriage requires the same actions unlocking is trust, starting it is letting her know you care, getting in is getting involved, putting it in gear is making effort, giving it gas and steering is leading by example.

Regular maintenance would be weekly date night, and once a year maybe change the tires, take it some place where it will be treated right and spend some money.

The comparisons can go on and on but the bottom line is it requires attention and effort if you want to keep it as something you enjoy.

1 comment:

Kristi said...

I think these are wise words. I'm gonna share them with my husband.