guilt

sometimes after a bacon double cheese burger i feel like i'm the worst vegetarian in the world, then i remember i'm not a vegetarian and i celebrate with a salami. mmmm stick o meat!

alien super computer

alien space craft have been spotted more and more frequently lately. they have become more bold in their appearances as well, some sitings lasting as long as 30 min or more. bright lights flying slowly in tight formations over heavily populated areas have been filmed from multiple directions. local law enforcement have taken hundreds of reports from eye witnesses. these ships have been witnessed by thousands of people in large cities all over the world. but now the aliens have taken it one step further by installing at least one super computer here on earth, there may be more it is hard to say for sure as the information is still being gathered.
we do know it weighs about ten pounds and is constructed of some type of soft, almost fatty like material, it jiggles when shaken. this super computer uses a human body as a battery, and as if this sick display of total disregard for human life was not enough, the human battery is still conscious. it is carried by the human host where ever he goes. it is a constant burden and bulges from the belly of the man it was implanted in. the super computers purpose is as yet unknown.
the implant was done late at night while the man slept, there is no visible scaring or evidence of the mysterious surgery. the man does feel some tightness and muscle soreness on the right side just under the ribs. the biggest evidence is the obvious bulge. the man simply went to sleep on Christmas eve and woke on Christmas day with this hideous protrusion just above his belt.
how do we know so much about these events? well...that man is me. i will keep you up to date as i try to discover more about this super computer in my gut and why i was chosen to carry this burden. it saddens me to not be able to see my toes but with the help of family and friends i hope to uncover the mystery of the implant and may even attempt to have it removed.

a day at the beach or a frozen basement

today i visited a house where in the basement; water rained from the pipes above like a beautiful april afternoon. drywall was laying on the floor taking a break from hanging on the ceiling. the carpet lazily waved like a tide pool at the beech. my foot prints were visible like tracks in the sand. the sound of water falls and rain drops were all around.
our cold weather snap a couple weeks ago was a bit much for the water pipes. then our warm week this week thawed it all out.
the kicker is the utilities are all on at the meter. but the heat was off at the thermostat and the breakers were all off at the box. not sure who planned this party.

workin on a book

been working on a book for those who don't know. about 4000 words so far. another 120000 and i should be there.
its about a kid with a magic sword. good and evil and all that. hope it comes out as good as i imagine it.

i would like to thank the little people and thanksgiving what nots.

when blogging you long for the day when you will find the extreme poularity of double digit followers. that day has come. i am now with eleven followers. i would like to extend a special thanks to my dearest friends on the internet, but most especially moe. with out you i would be at ten which is still double digits but none the less you make me an even eleven.

for thanksgiving we had two dinners to go to. one on thanksgiving day at my inlaws. and one in cedar on saturday with my....outlaws?? not sure what i would call my regular family. i guess i could just call them rf from now on. well down at the rf's thanksgiving two days after the real thanksgiving day we had a largeish crowed at my sister shastas. i say my sister shasta because moe may not know who she is. i know moe is not shasta because shasta is already a follower, under her real name of shasta. all the original gangstas were there. and all the outlaws inlaws or rf's inlaws which is to say the og's spouces. or ogs's. along with all the little peeps or ogp's.
the meal went well. we had a great feast on fancy dining sets in a big fancy house with a big fancy drink fountain with multiple levels and rotating lights. we ate on paper plates with plastic forks and drank from plastic cups, but there was an overwhelming amount of dirty dishes to deal with anyway. so overwhelming in fact i stayed clear of the kitchen for a good hour after dinner.
we laughed, played games and even did some photos. we did one photo called "sibling rivalry" during the sibling rivalry all my sisters and one brother decided to just pick on me. or at least it felt like that. i had fingers pulling my nose, fingers in my ear, an arm holding me in a half nelson and someone was tickling me. this could be suppressed anger and jealousy of my awesomeness or it could be total love and affection of an oldest brother who took great care of his younger siblings. except my younger brother justin who i threw down a flight of stairs, broke his nose twice and shot him with a pellet gun. i loved him them most.
on saturday several of the ogs's and a few og's (no peeps) headed out to three peaks for some paintball action. there were some fancy guns out there several of which broke down a number of times. my gun was a rental that may have been brought across the planes by original pioneer stock or ops's. it was tattered and torn and best of all it would drop paintballs out its nose if pointed down. it had a magic ability to shoot 2 or 5 paint balls at a time whenever it felt like it. the mask, it came with, was cleaned with 80 grit sandpaper and smelled of elder berries. tom was the lucky person to initiate me into the sport by shooting me in the hand at close proximity. it was a cold day and it hurt very much. all in all it was good times for nearly everyone, except ronny who sat at the top of a cold rock in the wind with a broken gun, wearing a facemask just in case a stray paint ball came her way.

explanation of unseen things

i would like to talk about something serious now. this is something that threatens peoples lives every day. most people never see it coming and is always blamed on something else, heart attack, stroke, trip and fall and any number of unavoidable sudden disasters in peoples lives.

its invisible ninjas. they are everywhere. you may think what can i do to protect myself? well there is a special group of people who do just that, protect you and your family from surprise invisible ninja attacks.

have you ever seen someone throwing a punch or a high round house kick to what appears to be air? or perhaps using invisible nun chucks, sword, or staff. these are trained professionals who not only see invisible ninjas but do fierce and deadly battle with them every day. have you ever seen someone who appears to be having a heated argument all by themselves. they are in a heated exchange with an invisible ninja.

now you may think that people using invisible guns would be included with this group of protectors. no they are just crazy people. there is no such thing as an invisible gun.

i did once witness a man at a bus stop who was in an invisible ninja rock band. i believe he used music to disarm his foe and turn them from their evil ways of senseless killing. i would like to tip my hat to that man, he has my utmost respect.

i am one of those protectors who is charged with defending the ninja blind. i and my family are under constant attack from these unseen menacing masters of kung foo. there have been many instances when a quick throat jab or kick to the head has saved the lives of those i love.

my reason for telling my story is to open the doors of communication and understanding. to build bridges of hope and caring between our two worlds. i do not do it to brag of my amazing bow staff skills or my ability to catch and return an invisible throwing star with inhuman like speed and accuracy. no this is about a new world where the ninja blind and protectors can come together under the umbrella of respect. you to respect my amazingness and me to respect your inability to defend yourself against the unseen deliverers of death.

you may join my cause by donating money so that i may provide the invisible but desperately needed weapons. when you donate you will receive a card with invisible letters explaining which protector was trained and what weapon they received on your behalf. also your name will be placed on a list that will entitle you to special protection. and perhaps the most comforting blessing you will receive; the next time you see someone karate chopping the air you will have the sense of belonging to that special group that defend the innocent against the evil that is... invisible ninja.

to moe

dear moe
i don't know who you are. you are one of my 9 followers bringing me to near double digits in popularity.
i am kind of excited, like i have a secret admirer or the like.
maybe you're my edward. sneaking into my room to watch me sleep with your diamond like skin. i appreciate your devotion but it creeps me out so don't hang out in my room while i'm asleep. i know its the in thing now but it just strikes me as wrong.
you could be a secret agent checking me out for a special assignment.
or a member of the secret service making sure i'm not planning an assassination. (i'm really not)
or an alien friend of mine keeping track of a mind control device that was planted years ago. (it no longer works)
or maybe your a millionaire on your death bed trying to find some kind soul who enlightens others with clever remarks on the world wide web that you would like to leave all your money to. well i am that man my friend.
i wait to see if you make a post so i can guess who you are. but you just sit there in utter silence with no photo and no clues as to your identity. its kind of weird but kind of ok with me. especially if there is money involved. unless i have to pay to get it shipped to me from nigeria